He Who Likes Cute, Fluffy Things
by Shiki105
Summary: CRACK ALERT! Hibari is fond of cute, fluffy things...rated so cuz of Gokudera and his foul mouth? It's not really yaoi but some might take it to be so...though I don't write yaoi. It's rather lame if you ask me. Well, enjoy anyway!


I got the idea for this a while ago and wrote it up. I suppose you could see it as yaoi...though I didn't plan it that way, yeah. It's just a useless crack fic which does not adhere to any kinds of rules at all...did you know, Hibari's a bit of a wizard, yo? XD lol, enjoy! Oh, and sorry if it doesn't make a whole bunch of sense...

Disclaimer: KHR is not mine.

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Tsuna cast his eyes around the park and, after seeing it was clear, he stepped out from behind the tree and breathed a sigh of relief. No one came after him so he let a small smile spread across his lips and stretched his arms. Now that he was here, he might as well wait it out a bit. Who knew when that guy would pop up?

The question was answered a few minutes later as he was sitting on the swing, going gently back and forth. His predator – yes, predator – stepped through the gates of the park. Due to the line of tall trees surrounding the gates, it wasn't possible to see who came into the enclosed children's park until the person was right next to the gate. And besides, Tsuna was too wrapped up in thinking about all the homework he had to do when he got back home to notice…until the man said his name. "Sawada Tsunayoshi."

"Eh?!" he was jolted out of his grim musings and nearly fell off the swing. "H-H-H-Hibari-san…!"

"You come with me." Hibari deadpanned, approaching the swing Tsuna was sitting on.

This time, in his hurry to get away from the "predator", Tsuna really did fall off. "OW!" but he paid his aching back no further attention as he scrambled backwards across the grass. "H-Hi…Hibari-san…please wait!"

Hibari paused, his face, as always, impassive. "What?"

Tsuna took the opportunity to stand up. "Um…why…why're you…coming after me…?"

Hibari was about to reply but distant familiar voices were calling the brown-haired boy's name. "OI, TSUNA! WHERE ARE YOU?!" that was Yamamoto.

"TENTH?! ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?! WHERE ARE YOU?!"

Tsuna felt relief flood through him. Although he knew Hibari wasn't here to beat him up (because the tonfa were not in sight and there was no killing intent emerging from his being), he was still glad for company; he hated being alone in such an unpredictable person's presence. "I-I'M IN HERE!"

Hibari's head had been turned towards the voices but he looked back when Tsuna called out. There was an odd smirk curling the corner of his mouth.

"THE PARK?! LET'S GO, BASEBALL FREAK!" Gokudera yelled.

Hibari continued his approach, still smirking in that odd way. It was making Tsuna more nervous. "Do I scare you, Sawada Tsunayoshi?"

_Very much!_ Tsuna thought as his back pressed against the dull green bar fence that enclosed the park. "Um…er…of-of course not, Hibari-san!" he lied, grinning shakily.

Once more, Hibari was about to speak when he was interrupted. "HIBARI! WHAT'RE YOU DOING TO THE TENTH?!" Gokudera was now in view and, climbing over the fence, he charged into the park.

"You could have just opened the gate." Yamamoto rolled his eyes as he pushed open the gate and strolled in.

Hibari had reached Tsuna's side and, standing in front of the quaking boy, he turned an unmistakeably threatening gaze on the two newcomers. "If you come any closer, I'll bite you to death."

Gokudera growled. "What do you think you're doing, threatening the Tenth like that?! Let him go!"

"I merely wanted to speak with him." Hibari said calmly.

"Eh?!" Tsuna was surprised. "Is that all?! I thought I did something wrong!"

But Gokudera wasn't going to calm down with just that. "About what?! What could you possibly have to say to the Tenth?! You never talk to people!"

_You don't either_, Tsuna thought dryly, _you shout_. He sighed and stepped out from behind Hibari. "It's all right. If it's just talking…I guess I could listen."

Gokudera looked upset. "B-But…Tenth…!"

"It's all right," Yamamoto spoke up, putting a comforting hand on Gokudera's shoulder, "if Hibari says he just wants to talk, then I'm sure he'll do only that."

"You shut up, baseball idiot! No one asked you!"

Tsuna interrupted before his friends started the usual argument. "Yamamoto's right. Ne, Hibari-san?" he looked up at the black-haired boy, trying to conceal the unease he felt at being so close to the head of the Disciplinary Committee.

"Hmm." Hibari's response was neither an affirmation nor a disagreement.

Tsuna did his best not to quail. "So, you wanted to talk in private?" he asked.

Hibari nodded once.

"All right then." the brown-haired boy tried to sound cheery, though his voice came out a little shaky. He looked to his friends. "So, I'll catch up with you guys in a while, okay?"

Gokudera looked indecisive. What could _Hibari_ possibly have to say to the Tenth? "But…Tenth…"

"If Tsuna says it's okay, then it's okay." Yamamoto said with his usual carefree smile.

"You shut up! I wasn't talking to you!"

"It's okay, Gokudera-kun."Tsuna smiled. He was feeling his impending doom (really, why else would Hibari want to "talk" with him unless he was in trouble for breaking some rule or other?) so he didn't want his friends caught up in it.

Whatever Hibari wanted, it couldn't be good. Tsuna had been leaving school, flanked by his two friends, when he'd spotted Hibari heading towards them. Feeling suddenly fearful, knowing that he'd been a less-than-ideal student that day and since Reborn hadn't been around to save his sorry behind, he thought Hibari had come to unleash his justice upon the brown-haired boy, so he'd ran. "T-Tenth?!" Gokudera had called out. "I'm sorry, guys! You should run too!" he'd yelled back. And Hibari had been saying his name in that usual cold manner of his as the distance increased between them. "Sawada Tsunayoshi…get back here, or I will bite you to death." That had been precisely why Tsuna had been running away; of course he wouldn't listen to that!

"But, Tenth! You don't know what this guy might do!" Gokudera continued earnestly.

"Hey, you should listen to Tsuna and stop being so dramatic." Yamamoto said.

"You shut up! How can he be okay with _that_ guy?!"

Tsuna sighed deeply. Gokudera-kun was much too protective for his own good. That level of obsession was not healthy. "Gokudera-kun, just go." _The sooner this is over with, the sooner I can return to that house and hope not to get into trouble with Reborn_. He thought, feeling glum.

Gokudera looked speechless with worry. Yamamoto had to take him by the arm and pull him away. "It'll only be a while." He said reassuringly. "Right, Tsuna?"

"Yeah!" Tsuna smiled in what he hoped was an encouraging manner.

"And, besides," the cheerful boy added in an undertone so only Gokudera could hear, "we'll stick around, just in case."

Gokudera seemed a little relieved at that. "All right. Fine! But one wrong move and we're beatin down that Hibari's sorry ass!"

"Keep it down, would you?"

"So, Hibari-san…wh-what did you want to talk about?" Tsuna asked as he fidgeted with the end of his tie.

Hibari hadn't said a word for two minutes. He'd gone over to rest in the shade of a tree. When Tsuna spoke, he didn't reply. Instead, he patted the grassy ground beside him.

"Eh?" Tsuna tried hard not to look around, to see if there was anyone else Hibari might be making the gesture at. "Me?"

Hibari nodded curtly so, nervously, Tsuna went to sit beside the black-haired boy. He tried to keep a good distance between them…just in case Hibari decided to suddenly go wild and "bite him to death".

Hibari put his hand up, with his index finger stretched out, and his little yellow bird, which was always on his shoulder, landed on it. "I like animals." he said without looking at Tsuna.

"Eh…huh?" Tsuna blinked, wondering what the sudden statement had to do with anything. He likes animals…? So what?

The older boy looked up and there was a mean-looking smirk curling his lips. "I like little animals. Herbivores make good pets."

"E-eh?" the brown-haired boy was beginning to feel even more uneasy.

Hibari's hand reached out…

Meanwhile, Yamamoto and Gokudera were failing at spying on the two…since it would have killed Gokudera to go with Yamamoto's plan twice in a row. After Hibari had invited Tsuna to sit by him, Gokudera had nearly run out from behind the tree that they were looking on from, his features screwed up with rage. "That bastard! How dare he try to act so friendly with the Ten…!" Yamamoto clamped a hand over his mouth while trying to restrain him.

"Will you stop?" the black-haired boy hissed. "They'll hear us! And, besides, there's nothing wrong with Hibari asking Tsuna to sit closer!"

"Let me go, you baseball freak!" Gokudera was flailing around, trying to free himself.

"Tsuna will be angry if you barge in." Yamamoto tried.

It worked. Gokudera immediately stopped trying to thrown Yamamoto off. "But…the Tenth could be in danger! You know that bastard Hibari's unpredictable!"

Yamamoto sighed. "Let's just watch, okay? If he really comes under threat, we'll intervene."

Grudgingly, Gokudera agreed and so they returned their gazes to Hibari and Tsuna…only to freeze with expressions on incredulity on their faces. "What the…?!"

Because, by the tree at the further end of the park, Tsuna's head was resting on Hibari's lap and the latter's fingers were combing through the former's soft brown hair. Tsuna looked…content and there was a never-before-seen half-smile tugging at Hibari's lips.

Yamamoto timely grabbed the back of Gokudera's shirt to prevent him from charging in. "Hold it. Hibari will bite you to death."

"I don't care! How dare he act so…so…familiar with the Tenth!" the grey-haired boy snapped. "I'll kill him!"

"Calm down. Hibari likes animals, right?"

Gokudera frowned at the sudden subject change. He glanced back at Yamamoto. "I don't know. So what if he does?"

Yamamoto grinned. "He likes small, cute, fluffy animals, right?"

"You're not making any sense, baseball freak!"

"So, I'm saying; observe!" He pointed over at Tsuna with dramatically. "A cute little fluffy animal!"

Gokudera gazed at him blankly. "Are you an idiot? Or do you want to eat dynamite? How dare you insult the Tenth?!" And, out of nowhere, he pulled out a few sticks of dynamite.

Yamamoto laughed. "No, I'm serious; isn't Tsuna a cute little animal? Hibari always calls him an herbivore, right?"

"What kind of idiotic logic is that, you stupid baseball freak?! Bastard Hibari calls everyone an herbivore! I'll kill you for insulting the Tenth!"

And so followed a game of tag between the two…with deadly explosions along the way.

Back in the park, Tsuna was happy to let Hibari continue running his hands through the younger boy's hair. _Hibari-san has a nice touch_…he thought as he sighed, feeling completely at ease.

"As I said, I like animals," Hibari smiled strangely. "From now, you are my pet."

"Hai…Eh?!" Tsuna bolted upright as the words registered properly. "Wh-why…do I have to be a pet?! I'm a human being!"

Hibari gave him a stern gaze. "You shall do as I say or I will bite you to death, herbivore."

Tsuna squirmed under those cold eyes. "H-Hai Hibari-san!"

"Good. Lie back down."

Feeling wary of his new "master's" unpredictable personality, Tsuna obediently lay back down with his head on Hibari's lap. He felt better when Hibari's fingers began to run through his hair again.

Over the next few weeks, Tsuna's friends definitely noted a change in him. Actually, a lot of people noted a change in him. He seemed to have developed a habit of adding "nyah~" to the end of his sentences and his nose had a tendency to twitch as he sniffed at the air (and some would even say that it had changed shape...though it they hastily add that it must just be their imagination...the nose looked more...cat-like?) And he got very excitable when Hibari was within sight…he would jump over tables and land on all fours in his haste to get to the one he now called "master". And he spent a lot of time with the head of the Disciplinary Committee.

And, what's more, Hibari seemed to expect this kind of behaviour. When Tsuna would rub his cheek against Hibari's leg, Hibari would reach out a hand and ruffle that fluffy brown hair.

But it was a gradual change so Gokudera didn't realise how odd it was that his beloved boss was acting like a cat until the situation had become so drastic. Angry beyond measure, he confronted Hibari, demanding what the hell he'd done to the Tenth.

But Tsuna had jumped in front of Hibari, as if to defend the boy, and bared his teeth and let loose a feral snarl. The grey-haired boy was certain he saw sharp teeth. "T-Tenth…" he stammered, not knowing what to do about this. So, instead, he growled at Hibari. "I'll make you pay for this, bastard!"

"Stand down, nyah~!" Tsuna's voice didn't even sound human anymore.  
Hibari smiled his strange smile and stroked Tsuna's chin, much to Tsuna's delight. "Herbivores don't try to act brave, Tsunayoshi."

"But, master…"

Hibari fixed Tsuna with a cold gaze. Tsuna cowered, mewling pathetically. Gokudera couldn't stand to watch anymore. Yamamoto, standing at the side and observing the exchange, sighed deeply. This was just weird.

The day would dawn when Hibari came to school flanked by a boy-sized, brown-furred cat with big, innocent brown eyes. Hibari's hands held magic of the strangest sort.

* * *

Urm...yeah, not that good, right? Like I said: Cu-RAC-Ku but the idea wouldn't leave so I wrote it down, yo *sigh* and what's with turning Tsuna into a cat anyway, yo? Weird...and it wasn't even that funny, man, I suck at writing humour...

Anyway, despite all that, I hope you weren't totally bored by it and enjoyed it at least a _little_ and do excuse any errors you might have come upon since I didn't proof read this at all, yeah. And with that, I shall take my leave

- oyasumi nasai -


End file.
